Falling in hate

Have you ever experienced seemingly irrational hatred? You know, that person you just love to hate? There’s no real reason why you’d hate them though, but you still do anyway?

So there was this girl (I don’t know where she is now) that I knew and at a point worked with. I hated her. By the gods I hated her so much! I couldn’t stand the sight of her. Every time I saw her I wanted to take the nearest swivel chair and bludgeon her to bloody death with it.

The strangest part was, there was nothing for me to really hate her about. As far as I know, she wasn’t a bad person and always was polite and well behaved. She was very nice to me when ever we spoke and never tried to be bitch.

But damn did I hate her so much! Once she said she likes that song “Waving Flag” by some dude, and from that day onwards I couldn’t stand to listen to that song, because I would think of her and become enraged.

Nope I am most definitely not attracted to her. There’s nothing about her that attracts me, looks or personality wise. She just pisses me off. Gods, I hate this woman.

But I have to bite it all down and be nice to her whenever we speak, because it’s not fair that I be mean to her without a proper reason.

You know what, secretly, I used to wish that maybe one day there would be a reason and I would really really let myself go and scream at her as much as I please.

But now I’ve let all those feelings go. Not to say that I still do feel that tinge of anger when I see her on facebook or something, but I don’t hate her anymore. It’s like seeing your ex girlfriend or something, you know, when you feel that small nudge of forgotten affection for the slightest second. Only with me, it’s the opposite.

Is it possible to fall in hate with someone? I believe so. I mean, hate is just another emotion like love isn’t it? It’s pretty much the opposite of what is called love. So yeah, I do admit that I’ve fallen in hate in the past.

Not that she was the first person either. There were some guys back at school, that I could not stand the sight of. They never spoke to me and I never spoke to them. We minded our own business, and never showed any ill-will towards each other. But why oh why did I feel such hateful feelings towards them?

I hope this rant inspired someone to write an awesome science fiction story about a guy who has no emotions of his own, but feels others emotions or something. That’s a thought…

You know, this is my first rant for this year… and after a very long time too…


~ by Prageeth Thoradeniya on August 30, 2010.

One Response to “Falling in hate”

  1. I irrationally disliked someone too. It was never hate though, just intense dislike.

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